GamesBurp

So I was thinking the other night about why I suck so much at games. I play a lot, almost every night and I have done since I was like 9 or some thing yet I still pretty much suck across the board. This all made me reminisce about my gaming history so i thought I’d bestow this upon you, the fateful reader…s?..

The first games machine we ever owned was a spectrum ZX

That's right, games on tape.

I still remember the day I went to the shops with my dad to buy it, he told me his mate had asked him to buy it because he couldn’t get to the shop. I was disappointed. Come Christmas though I unwrapped my presents and there was this bad boy. Man did I love this, it was revolutionary, It even came with a light gun. Yes it took 20 minutes to load a game and that 20 minutes was filled with a noise I can’t describe, the closest I think you can get to it is an old school modem dialing up or strangling a cat. Oh and you had to rewind them after you played.
Despite the limitations and incredible difficulty of most of the games I had so much fun with this. The idea of playing games on your TV blew my tiny little mind.

After I don’t know how long we then go an Atari St. The retarded brother of the more popular Amiga. They were pretty much the same machine though at the end of the day.

That's right, F keys, we're in the future now son.

Me and my Dad played the Atari a lot, We discovered the joys of 2 player gaming with titles like North and South. An epic precursor to games like command and conquer.
Set during the American civil war, you played either the North or the South(see what they did there) and had to fight for map control. Truly an awesome game and probably in my all time top 10(if such a thing existed.) The Atari was a big step forward, no more tapes, now we were on floppy disks, still some long loading times but now with out the horrendous dying cat noise.

We missed the hole master system and NES thing for some reason but then my Dad borrowed a Mega drive from a friend, we had it for a week. When it went back it only took a couple of days for the old man to pony up and get one.

Sexy, very sexy

I loved the Megadrive, it’s one of my all time favorite games machines, look at it. Isn’t it just one of the sexiest things you’ve seen. Look at the 16-bit displayed loud and proud. I had my megadrive for years and played it all the time, there wasn’t a game out there I wasn’t willing to play. My original megadrive got dropped and broke, we took it back to the shop in the vain hope they could do some thing. Luckily it still had about 3 or 4 days left on the warranty. Result, they could replace it but they only had Megadrive 2′s. Not as sexy but it worked better.
Now obviously the tent pole(snigger) title for Sega was Sonic and my gods was it good. I believe the Mario games are better overall but when Sonic burst onto the scene it was insane. How fucking fast did that blue hedgehog move. It was so incredibly impressive. But Sonic was also the first game to really show me how much I sucked. Thanks to the up,down,left,right A and C together cheat I was able to play every level on Sonic but I was never able to get past the Marble Zone. For any one who doesn’t know the Marble Zone is only the second fucking Zone on Sonic. The second. I had that game for years and I never did it. It haunts me to this day.

As this is turning into a long post I’ll cut it short here. I’ll do the second part later, maybe even a third part. As we get further along I’ll probably go into the games I played the most and such. I can’t remember too many from the early days. My poor tired little brain.

No Sonic, Fuck you.